Self-Sabotage... How Can You Stop It?

I was invited my a friend to the launch of her very own jewelry line this past Saturday. I was thrilled at the prospect of getting out of the house, seeing her after so many years and supporting her with her new endeavor as a WAHM.

Saturday came, my hubby was all set to take care of her that evening, I washed my hair and then, good old, reliable SELF SABOTAGE kicked in. I found myself looking for an excuse not to go! I always complain about how lonely I am and about how I don't have many friends, and here was an opportunity to reconnect with an old friend and maybe even make new ones and I was actively seeking an excuse not to go!!!

So if I knew that I was sabotaging myself, the question is, did I go to my friends launch? The answer, sadly, is NO. I kept telling myself I was going but before I knew it (or maybe I did) it was too late to leave the house anyway.

The important lesson from this story is that I just realized that the only reason I am without friends is because I don't allow myself to make them. I think that realizing I have this problem is the first step. Now that I am aware, I have to be strong and fight the urge to sabotage myself.

I have to reconnect with the old me! The pre-hubby, pre-baby, always ready to make new friends, ME!

Are there any self-sabotagers out there? How do you fight your self-sabotage?

5 comments:

  1. Thanks for the follow. I'm now following your lovely blog.

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  2. I'm the friend you ditched on Saturday...LOL...You are forgiven, It's hard...believe me I know...but you have to just be open to the new possibilities life presents you. After the launch I learned a couple of things myself...I'm shyer than I thought! And self confidence was lacking that night! Did people really like my stuff? What am I doing ? Should I really be doing this? After I counted the money from the sales I made that night, everything washed away. It wasn't the monetary aspect, it was the compensation of a job well done. If they didn't like, I don't think they would have bought it! And 2 people booked parties for July and August! So self-confidence...hello: I'm superwoman. If I can take care of a house, my husband, my 9 month-old son, 2 dogs and start a business...heck I'm the queen!

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  3. I am such a self sabotager! I'll get soo excited to go out with friends but am usually too tired once it's time to go out in the evening that I usually cancel. Not the best way to keep friends...eh? I think that it'll get easier as our kids get older. So we have to fight against it of course but we also just need to be patient:) Over from the FMC and am following you now!

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  4. Thanks so much for following my blog and for your comments!

    I am glad to hear that I am not the only one sabotaging myself. I am also glad that my friend has forgiven me and that she did well at her launch party.

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  5. Here's a different view. Rather than considering it self-sabotage, maybe you have changed.

    Pre-hubby, pre-baby we have all the time in the world to puruse our own lives and interests. It's all about "me". Now you are trying to start a business, blogging, and being a wife and mom. You just have less of you (and time) to go around. Maybe using your only free time to be social and spend with others is less enjoyable than it used to be -- for now! Someday you'll get your you time back and you will change again.

    One last thing -- you ARE making new friends everyday -- by blogging and reaching out to others. People you wouldn't know or meet otherwise. So stop feeling guilty!

    Okay, off my soapbox now!


    Dee :D

    http://newenglandnanny.blogspot.com

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